i love all kinds of music, but don't have much knowledge about current bluegrass, but once hitchhiking in New Mexico got a ride from an astronomer who was stopping at a bluegrass festival up the mountain a ways - it was green, the stage was taken by family group after another, each one more heartbreaking than the one before. They mostly wore hand sewn 'uniforms' outfits i guess is the right word. costumes. Simple or dressy, the music was magick. here in the City i take in a lot of local music, my friend Bob formerly of Fluff Grrl died last sunday. I just got back from a trip to Harbin Hot Springs as a guest of an employee who also happens to be the poet laureate of Lake county, an interesting twist of fate for a guy i knew 'back in the day' when we were scruffy spoken word artists who didn't deign to write down our moments of glory, or i didn't - i spoke off the cuff, called it a poem and generally got away w/ it for almost an entire decade. When i get up tomorrow i am, under the advice of a Tarot reader, going back to work on my novel, or writing at the very least. I am the epitome of the sensitive artist, psuffering entirely imagined anguish, my friend Emrys has over a hundred short films of me, a lot of it is meant to be funny, some of it is extremely offensive to somebody if not everybody, but the point of the whole shoot was to undergo a transformation. i'll not send you the link until i know you better. i don't think there is anything in the whole ouvre that i couldn't watch w/ my mom, tho my sister who is the kind of devout christian who didn't let my nephew see the Harry Potter films, or read the books would be horrified at some of the ways i disrespect religion in some of them. I have been away from home a lot recently, over President's Day Weekend i went to the Pagan Convention they hold every year, for many years now in the Doubletree Hilton in San Jose. for some reason i forgot my pain medicine, and a lecture on Gender and Spirituality may have sound good when i first looked at the schedule, but once the time rolled around i wasn't in teh mood.
A friend Blake who is an atheist, bipolar like myself, and actually being the person with the right perspective who cd tell me that he didn't think i was on the right medicine. I took his advice and told the psychiatric nurse practitioner i didn't want to take the anti-seizure drugs any more, and was willing to give time released lithium a try, even tho regular lithium had sucked an epic amount of my personality away. as my lover of the season told me, I was over medicated. My 'she's not a doctor and i don't want to write out psychiatric nurse practitioner everything, but Alice is half chinese and the other some european i haven't quized her on the details of her ancestry. Alice is fresh and young and beautifull, is lulled into thinking as she has been taught that is best to adjust meds gradually and a much more aggressive previous pyschiatrist had gotten really good results. it took months of crying everyday to admit a willingness to take an anti-depressant again. we decided that from my insurance co.'s formulary that LexaPro was new and worth a try. i tried lowering the dose cuz it seemed that i was rather manic, cut the dose didn't work, so we tried increasing this. Voila! no more tears.
i am much more at peace, but after listening to me ramble the last half hour my roommate Lizie said "Get your manic ass to bed." it takes my pills about 4 hours to force me to sleep, but i surrender most nites w/out the epic insomnia that haunted my life until recently. i credit the homeopathic treatment i received for 'racing thoughts' made of coca. yes, that coca, but the Dr. describes it as a whole plant extract. i don't know how, but he's an old hippy looking guy who is an M.D. and a homeopath and i don't say his name anymore cuz he keeps giving me proscribed remedies.
